On my personal journey with Jesus, I count on the wisdom I gain from the Holy Spirit. He is my cherished counselor, friend and guide on this crazy ever changing earthly journey as we are Heaven Bound.
With the sudden death of one of my Beloved children, I have been wondering why I had no clue of this impending separation. In my personal relationship with Him, I have been allowed to know beforehand and process other losses so close to my heart. I don't ask "why" but I do ask what I missed that might have prepared me for this devastating arrow to my heart?
I live my life knowing this world is not our home, and that we are just passing through. I have taught all my kids and grand kids that same understanding of eternal life that follows for those of us who believe.
As a praying parent, and now as a grieving one, I have always prayed that when I see my Lord face to face I can say like He did, "I lost not one of those you have entrusted to me". I count it my spiritual responsibility and privilege to see to their spiritual care and keeping all their days here and on into eternity.
Today the Lord reminded me of a conversation we had in Dec 2018 when I was thinking about how much I cherish all my children and their children. My thoughts were all about our eternal relationship and how vital it is for all my beloveds to translate into the Presence of the Lord when their days here are over and to be reunited together on the other side. I was prompted to offer my thanksgiving that as the mom of 6 kids, I have been spared the heartache of losing any one of them here on earth. I remember my Lord saying at the time, "If you lost all you have here, will I be enough?" Of course. Lord where would I go from here? You have the words and promise of eternal life. I believe everything I experience here is preparation for there.
That said, what followed was the beginning of a blog started on that day along the lines of our conversation that morning. Looking back I realize how my Lord was indeed preparing my heart for what He was about to do in taking my son home. He brought me back to the blog in answer to my heart question and to reinforce His promise to never leave me nor forsake me.
Here is that blog:
I Lost Not One
"The Holy One calls to me this morning. As a parent, I have always seen it as my responsibility to pray for my kids and now for their kids and extended family. This responsibility has been life-long and while all my kids are grownups I am still burdened to pray them through all that life serves up as challenges to them. In fact, just when I think I can take a sigh of relief something else seems to come undone and a faithful prayer becomes necessary.
I hear all the enemy’s arguments in my mind that “it’s their life, their walk, their Red Sea to cross and your time to let go. While the direct intrusion of my maternal protectiveness is out of date, my prayers for their wisdom, discernment, discretion, or faith never loses its shelf life.
Today the Holy One takes me to the Prayer of Jesus as He was about to leave planet earth. As I pray for my family and friends, the Lords speaks of His ordained will. “I gave these people and relationships to you… never forsake praying for them”.
The voice of the Holy One drives out all the words of the enemy that I should relax and disengage from my prayer privilege and responsibility. The Lord’s parting prayer for His disciples and BTW over all of us who come to believe is written in John 17. His heart desire is for us to be with Him eternally. My heart desires that ALL my beloveds be with Him and me eternally. That desire forms the basis of the burden that drives me to pray.
The words of the Holy One give the sense of ownership that Jesus reflected in His prayer.
“Holy Father, keep through Your Name those whom You have given Me". As a parent my prayer is the same."
The hole that my son left here in our earth life and journey is huge yet to wish him back here to face all the challenges on this fallen planet and battle all the attacks by the enemy is never a consideration. My wounded warrior has been air lifted off the battle field and taken home. I celebrate what Jesus died to provide and look froward to seeing my beloved healthy and strong and living the best time of his life.
Grief is an emotion that most likely never ends here. We miss those we love. But the knowledge that we will see them again is the reason for our hope and peace in the process.
Even as I weather the separation and loss of one of my kids here on earth, I must continue to pray for the ones who remain and the next generation of grands and coming great-grand littles who have yet to make that vital decision about their future destiny and eternal life through Jesus, the One and Only Savior of the world. I will continue to pray for each and all of them so that when my journey here is over I can joyfully say, "Lord I lost not one of those You have entrusted to me!"
Even as I weather the separation and loss of one of my kids here on earth, I must continue to pray for the ones who remain and the next generation of grands and coming great-grand littles who have yet to make that vital decision about their future destiny and eternal life through Jesus, the One and Only Savior of the world. I will continue to pray for each and all of them so that when my journey here is over I can joyfully say, "Lord I lost not one of those You have entrusted to me!"
The Spirit is Calling. Can you hear Him?
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